Marlboro Sneaks Back Into Television Advertising With ‘Isn’t It Time We Started Smoking Again?’ Campaign – The Onion
RICHMOND, VA—Describing a plan to reverse the nation’s long-declining rate of cigarette use, an anonymous source at tobacco giant Philip Morris confirmed Friday that Marlboro had sneaked back into television advertising with the launch of its new “Isn’t It Time We Started Smoking Again?” campaign. “It’s been more than 50 years since our ads were banned from the airwaves, so we figured the authorities have probably let their guard down and won’t notice if we gradually start running a TV spot here and there,” a company marketing executive reportedly said of the commercial that ran at 3:30 a.m. on a cable channel and featured a new iteration of the iconic Marlboro Man, who is seen smoking in silence for 57 seconds before he looks at the camera and declares, “Damn, it’s good to be back.” “Our approach with this campaign was to ask the consumer, ‘Hey, what happened? It’s been a while, huh?’ There is a large segment of the population out there who can’t remember the last time they pulled out a nice, full-flavored pack of Marlboro Reds and treated themselves to a cigarette. We just think it’s time they gave smoking another shot.” Reached for comment on the illegal ad, the Federal Communications Commission said it could not provide a statement because all four of its commissioners were downstairs on the sidewalk enjoying their first smoke break in years.